|Friday, August 11th, 2006|
On the bus last night I ended up sitting a couple of seats down from a very young woman.. possibly a teen... with a screaming baby. She looked across the aisle and said to the woman seated there, "You have any children?" The woman responded, "No." A few minutes passed and the young mother said, "How about grandchildren?" The woman looked up at her with that look that clearly says, 'Are you serious?' The young mother clearly was, so the woman responded with another, "No."
Fortunately the bus driver insisted that the mother move at that point since the baby's screaming was making it difficult for him to concentrate, so we were spared any further inane attempts at conversation.
|Monday, May 22nd, 2006|
|Tuesday, March 14th, 2006|
Overheard in at the Gem Show at the Vet's Memorial on Saturday:
Woman: "Honey, I'm not going to *make* you buy me a $4,400 dollar ring."
Man: "Well, I'll think about it."
|Monday, February 27th, 2006|
(Said of OSU campus cuisine)
Girl: "This potato is dee-lish!"
If by dee-lish she means synthetic, then she's right on key.
|Wednesday, December 14th, 2005|
Michelangelo must have been ANCIENT by then
In a vet hospital waiting room, a man was discussing his trip to Italy. There, he was overwhelmed by the site of Michelangelo's David, causing him to comment:
"It's just so hard to believe they could make something like that back in the 19th century!"
Holy crap, he was 400 years old when he carved David? That's EXTRA impressive!
|Wednesday, December 7th, 2005|
Overheard at Mac's:
"I do documentation all day, but really, I'm absolutely consumed by sculpture."
|Wednesday, November 9th, 2005|
kid: hey! HEY! has it been fifteen minutes yet?
guy: fifteen minutes since what?
kid: since the bus was supposed to come!
guy: what time was it supposed to come?
kid: in fifteen minutes!
|Thursday, October 13th, 2005|
as i am standing in mirror lake, three girls wearing cowboy hats that had already proved due to prior comments that they were the most brain sufficient women i have ever encountered began to utter the following:
Girl 1: "What should I get?"
Girl 2: "Get chips, those are kind of like bread"
Girl 3: "Yea, get bretzels!"
|Sunday, October 9th, 2005|
My neighbors are the kind of guys who practice cornhole
Neighbor 1: Dude, did you see that girl??
Neighbor 2: Dude! She's got boobs!!!
No shit, Sherlock.
|Monday, September 26th, 2005|
Panera in Polaris
As a bill came to be $16.01, a customer pays $20.01. The employee, a teenaged (hopefully not older) girl, calls the manager over and says,
Girl: Her bill is $16.01 and she gave me a twenty and a penny. How do I figure out the change?
Manager: Please excuse us.
/both go to the side/
Manager: Give her 4 dollars and work on stocking the bagels.
Current Mood: amused
At Nationwide Arena:
Yo muthafucka, you know where I'm from? Fuckin' Brooklyn! If they ain't got a badge or a gun, I ain't puttin' shit out! Let them try to put shit out!
|Thursday, September 1st, 2005|
overheard @ the coldplay concert last night
: she said when they got in the gate, security told them to go to the right.idiot boy
: to the left?irritate girl
: ........do you understand anything
i'm telling you?
and later -drunk, spaced out girl
: coldplay, hmmmm... are they any good? Current Mood: tired
|Saturday, August 27th, 2005|
Overheard at UDF
White bread guy to his friend: that guy is stoned
they look at me-
Me: yes, motherfucker I'm stoned
My also stoned friend: (laughter) you guys are square jackasses
the clerk shook his head rung up my munchies... the other two walked out without saying a word...
|Wednesday, July 27th, 2005|
These are old, but funny, and it's quiet here....
In the cheese section of Wild Oats...
Little Girl: (picks up a bag of those little Laughing Cow cheeses) Mommy, what are these things?
Mom: They're little cheeses.
Little Girl: (horrified) Little Jesus???!!
At the Victorian Village garage sale -- the woman's dog had just dropped the doll it was chewing on in my friend's yard.
Woman: Dingo! Dingo come on! Dingo, don't forget your baby, pick up your baby! Dingo, get your baby!
|Thursday, July 21st, 2005|
help desk fun
My boyfriend works at a help desk and this is the email he just sent me:
UGGGGG. I just got yelled at by some one in the mail room, because I questioned what they meant by "NO MY SECOND PASSWORD!" It turns out that their user name is their "first password" and their password is their "second password"
|Monday, July 18th, 2005|
Old School Overheardness
I got two classic witticisms from Back In The Day. I wrote them down years ago.
Anyone remember that coffeeshop "Idiot Boy"? Which then became, uh, "Slow Crow", and then "Millenium"? Or perhaps it was the other way around.
I had many nights there in my 90's slackery days, and heard many raver kids, pre-goth-wannabes, and overall tards muse on their lives over coffee.
One, who had done a handful of drugs of many types that night, let forth with the statement:
"I can feel the sky eating me."
Another, one of a pair of grungy grunge alternakiddies, proudly said:
"Well, I mean, I want to *look* like I live on the street, but at least my clothes are clean."
|Sunday, July 17th, 2005|
in the foyer of the Meijer on Hamilton Road in Gahanna, while passing a woman talking on the phone:
"BITCH, you'd better stop fakin'!"
|Tuesday, July 12th, 2005|
Girl: I don't know anything about fruits and produce and stuff. Is fruit even produce or is that just meats?
|Friday, July 8th, 2005|
according to the info...
that says every 7th member gets free cotton candy, I've officially got some sugary goodness coming since I'm the 7th to join! :)